I’ve been thinking about about why self care is at times a challenge. Pardon me while i meander in thought for a bit.
There is a reason we find ourselves completely depleted at times. We forget. You see, it is parallel to much of our lives. For instance, when we are trying to get a lot of things done, we forget. We forget that time keeps moving forward. It doesn’t stand still while we complete a task. That is why we end up being late for things, because we wanted to do that one more thing before leaving the house. So we are stressed and late. We forget that time is dynamic, not static. We run out of time because we didnt have the luxury or time to plan.
The same thing can happen with eating, exercise, prayer, and meditation. We told ourselves we’d do those things after surviving a crisis. But there is always another crisis. For now the crisis is Coronavirus.
But again, we didn’t have time before. Now everything is topsy turvy.
The same thing happens with $ if we operate with a planned budget, and stick to it.
Now, if we keep these things in mind, we can put together a plan. We put together a time, attention, and dedication budget. Here is an example to kind of explain what i mean. Years ago my husband and i were in a grief support group. Our infant daughter died when she was 10 months old. The group leader was explaining how handling grief is different from wallowing helplessly in it. Eventually, she said, you can control it. She said you tell yourself like from 2pm to 4pm you sre going to cry, scream, and be totally sad. Outside those parameters, she said, you tell yourself when paralyzed by grief, i am not denying my feelings. BUT, i choose to set this aside til 2 pm.
We used this method to navigate grief. It helped. Perhaps we can try this with the health crisis.
Perhaps by having a plan, we can gain some sanity. Perhaps having a time and emotion budget/plan, we will feel enough not totally at the mercy of the details and pressures of life.
Perhaps we can set time aside for self care, even 10 minutes. And consciously say aloud to ourselves, ok….. i am taking 10 min to walk, or meditate. I realize this means i have 10 min less for chores. But that is my decision anyway. Maybe we can lay out a “time budget”….
What do you think