I don’t know if you are familiar with the movie 1776. In that movie, John Adams sings a song and mentions crossing the Rubicon and commitment. It is a powerful moment. He is referring to those point of no return, no turning back moments. You know, where you have such clarity, and there is no doubt in your mind that henceforth things will be different.. Your view, your mindset has permanently changed; no equivocation.
I reached that point this year after multiple family events that I told you about in the previous post. I discovered the truth. The truth about how some people viewed me and viewed life. I realized that I can no longer place the keys to my happiness, peace of mind, quest for joy, health in someone else’s pocket. Their views and opinions of me are not necessarily accurate. Arguing with them is pointless. The story of my life can still be one of joy.
I learned that just because someone wants me to fight, argue, view things negatively or feel down, doesn’t mean I have to go there. Instead, I can just keep marching forward. I don’t have to accommodate everyone to the detriment of my own walk with God.
Always end the day with a positive thought. No matter how hard things were, tomorrow’s a fresh opportunity to make it better. I saw this on a poster the other day. “You have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” I am committed to taking care of my heart, mind, body, and soul. Those who minimize and insult? In the past they could bring me down and get me brooding for days, if not weeks. Most days I stay strong. I don’t participate in the argument. I don’t respond to putdowns or insults. I just kind of nod and change the subject. I realize that they either can’t help it or don’t realize how soul crushing their words or body language can be. I walk away and pray as I go.
They are not welcome in my safe harbor. No, I do not tell them this. I do not even discuss it. Is that cold? I don’t think so. i can separate myself from the put downs. I just go about my tasks. No turning back. No volunteering to be a doormat in order to keep the peace. Why? Keeping the peace wasn’t really happening. There wasn’t peace.
Now, in my heart and soul, there is peace. No circumstances have changed. I just don’t let stuff erode my soul. Reaching this point has restored my relationship with God. He never left me, of course. Rather, I could not hear Him as His voice was drowned out by my ricochet reactions. The Rubicon. You bet I crossed the Rubicon. One side of the river, a crowd. The other side? Peace. God.