Today is a lovely day. The sky is a brilliant, brilliant blue.It rained last night–so the trees and lawn look freshly scrubbed and vibrant. The rain cleared the dust in the air and the mountains look bigger than life—not hidden in a slight, dusty haze. The temperature dropped a little to give us a little tease that fall is coming.
The colors of the sky are as intense as they were 10 years ago on the morning of 9/11. It was the morning my life changed—the morning I could no longer naively believe in safety. It was the morning I saw hate enter my country in a new and still present way.. . moments before the attack I was gazing out the window into my yard full of trees and sipping my morning coffee. I was relaxed and innocent. That changed.
Immediately after the attacks I knew with such clarity how people may have felt after Pearl Harbor. I was frozen in place….I could NOT believe how free we had been and how we might not ever be again. I felt helpless….I looked back out at the sky and trees—and I wept. I wept for everyone who lost someone in the attacks. Their morning had begun unremarkably and now their loved ones were gone…forever….
So today I look out at my beautiful blue sky and I am grateful we have not been attacked since. I am grateful that my little family is safe and sound here with me. I am grateful for love, sunshine, trees, mountains—and grateful that I am currently unafraid when planes fly overhead. But I will never forget that September morning. How can I? There are moments that just stay with me…moments when I wish I could turn back time and make it turn out differently…but that is a topic for another post!