How long do you stay angry at someone or something? What’s the longest grudge you’ve ever held? Why do you think we hold grudges?
Well now, isn’t that interesting. This is something I really have to work on sometimes. I especially seem to hold a grudge if someone has hurt my husband or my son. I get this self-righteous uppity-ness about me. i go strutting around ticked off. I hold on to that opinion and feeling WAY to long. It truly interferes with my ability and willingness to be charitable.
It takes a lot of work to undo the grudge and let it go. It is like deck mold….it keeps coming back if your deck is in full shade. Without the sunshine, and good drainage to remove the water, you are going to have a very moldy deck. It is essential to keep cleaning that deck, bleaching it, and whatever strategy you have for removing the mold and preventing it from growing back. It may be necessary to cut back some tree branches so that the sun can shine on the deck and prevent the mold from returning. I would call the analogy of cutting back the tree branches the equivalent of letting go of the grudge.
The other parts (the cleaning etc) are more like the apology. It is a beginning, but it doesn’t soften and free the heart. I think holding a grudge is plain old pride. Pride gets in our way so often: it makes us lose our temper; it makes us hold a grudge; it makes us impatient; and that is just the beginnning!
What do you think about grudges?